Fabio-He's Not

The summer between my 7th and 8th grade year I read a lot, 112 Harlequin and Silhouette romances to be exact. In my reading I could escape the small town where I lived and travel the world cheaply. Plus, I dreamed of being the young innocent heroine, destined to be romanced by a world wise man, who also usually happened to be wealthy and speak with an accent. There were always obstacles to overcome but love triumphed. 

This romance overload affected me then, when I fantasized about being swept off my feet and loved passionately, adored always, and cherished above all else by a tall dark and handsome Greek business tycoon.  Crazy? No doubt, but that hasn't diminished my disappointment with the the reality of love and marriage which I suppose means it affects me even now.

I got my guy. The one of my dreams and while he is not from Greece, he is named after a Greek city. Coming to accept that wine, roses, flowery prose, and flying off to private islands for spontaneous picnics are not a part of my man's genetic code or his budget was not really the problem.  The days where we don't speak other than to pass information; the times when work supersedes family (i.e. me), the days where we don't touch unless it's accidentally, those are the things that I can't seem to move beyond.  I have always thought my romance novel summer was to blame for my discontent, but today I read a verse in Genesis that makes me rethink that position. 

Let me set the scene: Adam and Eve have committed the first sin after being deceived by that sneaky snake into doubting the truth of God's words.  When God comes to talk with them in the garden later that evening and confronts the issue of their sin, he gives them each specific consequences to the disobedience. Read the account for yourself in Genesis chapter three  at Bible Gateway, http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis+3&version=NIV

What struck me as I read the story of humanity's fall from God's grace was the truth in the woman's curse. Verse 16 says:


    To the woman he said,

   “I will make your pains in childbearing very severe;
    with painful labor you will give birth to children.
    Your desire will be for your husband, 

    and he will rule over you.”


I've given birth four times, I can attest to the pain of childbirth and labor. It's that second part that I don't want to want to claim, I think it makes me sound weak but I know it's true too.
Her desire will be for her husband and he will rule over her.  Surprisingly it wasn't the "rule" part that got me, it was the truth in the "desire" part. I long for my husband to treasure me. I want for his attention, his touch, even when I don't want to want too. You know what I mean?   Romance writers certainly seem too. By the way I stopped reading that genre and moved on to suspense and crime.