Where's My BUZZ?

Woody and Buzz,  Sponge Bob and Patrick, Thelma and Louise, are all fictional best friends. Patti, Laura, Dee, Cheryl, Cyndi, and Dawn have been some of my very closest friends in adulthood.  Robin,  Annette, Heather, Berta, and Geanni are a few of the ones I feel had potential to be great friends but job changes and moves did not allow those relationships to be developed fully.

 The nature of my husband's job has required several moves by our family.  In fact, between December of 1999 and July of 2005 we moved four times living in three states. The frequent moving didn't lend itself to long term, in depth, let me bare my soul to you relationships. My children were younger and so the absence of friendships was felt but not dwelt upon. I do have many acquaintances and even feel a certain kinship with some of them but no BFF is to be found.

I always thought that once we were settled I would meet and connect with women or at the very least a woman with whom there would be a soul connection. I have also always believed myself to be good friend material.  I remember birthdays, try to listen with interest, share more positively than negatively, and am genuinely happy for the successes of others. REALLY.  Of the women I have met there are usually a couple of scenarios that play out:

                    1.  They are already entrenched in their female
                          relationships with little room  left for
                          new ones.(this is understandable what with
                          the work and family obligations already
                          vying for time too)
                    2.   They seem okay with making new friends             
                           but are only into it so much as the other person
                          is the one doing all the relationship work
                          (making the calls, issuing invitations, etc.)


We have been in our current home for five years the longest we have lived anywhere since that first move in '99.  One thing that has been bothering me is this last move brought us back to an area where we had lived from 00-02. We were gone for about four years but I did think it might be easier to connect since some of the groundwork was already in place. No such luck.   Of course, time and experience have changed all of our perspectives and needs. I know that I am in a different season of life now as are those who stayed here and we didn't go through those transformations together. For me to expect to pick up where we left off was  unrealistic.


 Facebook is a great way to catch up and keep up but there is only so much these virtual relationships can accomplish in the real world in real time. Sometimes I just want to reach out and touch someone as the old AT&T commercial said. Maybe an E-Harmony kind of site to match friends would help.

I would have my ad say something like MWF with teens and younger children, enjoys reading, discussing current events, has a strong faith in God, likes eating out, going to movies, today's country music and 80's rock,  loves shopping, laughing and day trips and worries how age is affecting her body and whether she has failed as a mother and would occasionally like to gripe about men. Seeks friendship of someone with similar interests who will not only accept support and encouragement but offer it as well.

Good Gifting

I love presents!!! I love to buy them; I love to receive them.


Unexpected ones are the best, but I don't knock the birthday and Christmas offerings. Unfortunately for Sparta, some of his gift attempts have been less than warmly received; e.g.- the sandwich maker(Christmas), vacuum cleaner (which he claims was not a gift but was somehow given to me on my 40th birthday), or the light up 10x magnifying mirror (Valentine's Day). I exchanged the sandwich maker for a pretty red vase and as for the other two ,well, let's just not talk about them.


When choosing a special something for someone, I tend to try and think of the individual's personality, as well as interests and hobbies of the recipient. I do not enjoy vacuuming or seeing the chin whiskers up close and personal. By no stretch of the imagination could I comprehend the thought process that brought Sparta to his purchases.


After what I considered several less than stellar gifts from my hubby, I took to giving not so subtle hints. I would make lists out with items from which he could choose. One of my lists suggested jewelry. Bless his heart, he said he didn't have money to buy me something so pricey. He had never heard of costume jewelry.


Now to brag on him, Sparta has hit a few home runs when it comes to picking things. When our oldest daughter was born, he brought a pair of diamond earrings to the hospital (unexpected); he gave me an amethyst and diamond ring when our second daughter was born (unexpected); there were ballroom dance lessons because he noticed I liked to watch Dancing With the Stars(unexpected) . It seems that when he is able to choose to give a gift out of a desire to give rather than some arbitrary obligation to give, I am always delighted with his choices.


I've recently been thinking of the gifts I wish God had given to me. The ones that might be obvious-musical talents, artistic abilities, or lots of money to support causes. I am guessing He knew I would not use them appropriately. I see myself more as a Madonna the entertainer rather than Madonna the mother of Jesus type. That I have been given this very breath is a gift not to be taken for granted and yet I know that I have not been grateful to the one who allowed it. My prayer is that I recognize not only ordinary gifts but also the unexpected ones; all with the knowledge that THE giver of good and perfect gifts knows what I need most.

Staples

  As a kid, I never understood pantry staples.  I was familiar with the small bent metal that kept my papers together and certainly didn't see any similarity between it and flour, sugar or oil.  Now all grown

the real deal

Do you realize how much we rely on fake?  Spray on tans(to look as though we've spent time outside), air fresheners created with chemicals (so our houses smell like apples, cookies, fresh linen, or rain), artificial plants, fingernails and sweeteners.  It's crazy.  Why is so much of our time and money devoted to fake when the real is available?

 Today I will bake something(with sugar not Splenda), wash clothes and spend some time in the sun. None of it virtually.