Did You Hear Me?

In my 12 plus years of being called to the bi-annual teacher's conferences, never once have I dreaded more what a teacher might say than this year's conference with Wesley's teacher. His graded papers  have had some not so positive notes this year. Although Wesley makes good grades and we've been told since pre-k just how very smart he is, his attention is not always given to what it should be. I can't say we were surprised by his teacher's observations; on the soccer field and at the martial arts studio frequently Wesley would be the last one to heed instruction.

He's a dreamer. He writes songs, plans his adventures, thinks about Beyblade configurations and battles, and these are all good things for a boy of nine to be doing. Unfortunately, a great deal of the time he is doing it on his teacher's instructional time. Do you remember the scene from the John Candy movie "Uncle Buck" where Buck has been called to a meeting with the assistant principal of Maisey's school.  Ms. Horgrath tells him that Maisey is a bad egg and Buck's response is priceless. I attached the clip(there is use of one ugly word).

 Anyway- Wesley is not a bad egg either and to be fair his teacher didn't suggest that he is one, she pointed out that he doesn't seem to be paying attention sometimes.  It's frequent enough that  his hearing has been questioned.  I assure you he can hear, albeit selectively (that is something he gets from his dad).  He also tends to jump into his work without reading the instructions (another male trait, I do believe).

At least no one suggested Ritalin as an answer. If it had been brought up I might have had to consider homeschooling  and I don't want to do that.

In any case I am looking for ways to improve his listening skills, and if something works for him I might just try  it out on his daddy :)   I wonder if it's too late to call a conference with Sparta's mother.

More Than You Want to Know

Insects, bugs, arachnids, I'm sure there's purpose in their existence somewhere, but it's not in our house.  I've been battling pantry moths for several months. I may be bigger and smarter but they procreate rapidly and hide very well.

A couple of moths flying around, not terrible. Their wriggly disgusting larvae wiggly in our foods and , heaven help us, on the kitchen ceiling are positively repulsive. After cleaning out the pantry and throwing out what once was a mighty stockpile of crackers, jello, cake mix and cereal, they are still here.

Indian Meal Moth Larva

Yesterday I did some additional research on getting rid of them and read some horror stories, (the worst of which had the maggot looking creatures falling from the ceiling into cooking food, ewww).  I learned they not only eat your foods but can digest human and animal hair, they lay eggs in crevices and other spaces that cannot be reached therefore cannot be destroyed, they hatch out at intervals so even when you think they're gone, they're not.  I learned that moth ball fumes are carcinogenic and not much can be done about preventing the eggs from hatching, and that most uncanned  shelf stable foods contain eggs, insects parts and traces of fecal matter in tiny amounts shown to be safe enough for consumption (ewww, again).

After cleaning out the pantry, again, and then removing all my kitchen drawers to be vacuumed and bleached.  I Googled again and ordered pheromone traps from Amazon.com and called my local pharmacy to have them order lavender oil.  Cotton balls dipped in the oil are supposed to deter the moths, and the traps catch the male ones and ,hopefully, prevent breeding. Some other advice given was freeze your foods for four days to kill any unhatched eggs lurking inside and keep your flour and grain products stored in your freezer.  

Several years ago my mother-in-law had the same issue and spent a fortune on Tupperware and glass containers, at the time I thought it was much ado about nothing much. I see now that I was wrong and if you sell Tupperware, let me know.  I might be in the market for airtight containers.

Parenting Winter

Let this be the thing.  I have prayed that one sentence more since my kids have become teenagers than in my entire life before then.

For every poor choice being made I pray it. “Lord let this be the thing”, and God knows just what I mean, let this be the thing that opens their eyes and gives them wisdom to think beyond a moment.  For every disrespectful word spoken in anger I pray it. “Lord let this be the thing” the time where he or she realizes just how hurtful words can be.  Many times when I need to have a word with one of the kids, I pray something similar “Lord, let this be the time”. The time they will understand that I don’t want to keep them from good things, I don’t want to shelter them so that they never experience the world, and I am not intentionally antagonizing to make their life more difficult.  I only want the best for each one and some times (most times) our ideas of how to achieve that differ.  I tend to think forward, wondering if the action is worth the consequence or even the potential consequence. The kids, however, do not. Their hindsight isn’t even 20/20 yet.

 Recently a dear sister in Christ shared a memory from when her own daughters were teenagers.  She told me that once while having dinner with HER then teenage daughter, she looked over at her and said “I think I’m going to like you when you grow up”.  Even as I laughed, I felt a great relief and surge of hope because I happen to know her daughter and she is a fantastic person whose love of the Lord shines through in all that she does. Parenting teens seems to be the winter of child rearing, although everything may appear bleak, I have confidence that come spring some of those seeds underneath the cold, harsh conditions are going to sprout and eventually flourish. Praise God!

Thank you Kate Middleton!

Pantyhose are becoming trendy again, or at least that's what I've read in a couple of places.  The last time they were considered fashionable was around twenty years ago, although I don't think they were ever considered out of vogue by some. 

I, however, have missed them, desperately. The way they hold things in while leaving no visible lines.  The smooth sexy sheen of the leg encased by them. The evenly tanned appearance they lend year round. The beauty of hidden stubble on days when there's no time to shave.  If I were a stronger person I would have continued to wear them despite their uncoolness but, I believe,  most women will tell you, no matter the age, the desire to be cool is still there.

Kate Middleton (Prince William's new wife) was seen wearing them and her fashion icon status has made it okay to wear them again. (Smaller) Hip (Smaller)Hip Hooray!!

Hane's Alive here I come.  Investors I think you might want to buy stock. :)

Fabio-He's Not

The summer between my 7th and 8th grade year I read a lot, 112 Harlequin and Silhouette romances to be exact. In my reading I could escape the small town where I lived and travel the world cheaply. Plus, I dreamed of being the young innocent heroine, destined to be romanced by a world wise man, who also usually happened to be wealthy and speak with an accent. There were always obstacles to overcome but love triumphed. 

This romance overload affected me then, when I fantasized about being swept off my feet and loved passionately, adored always, and cherished above all else by a tall dark and handsome Greek business tycoon.  Crazy? No doubt, but that hasn't diminished my disappointment with the the reality of love and marriage which I suppose means it affects me even now.

I got my guy. The one of my dreams and while he is not from Greece, he is named after a Greek city. Coming to accept that wine, roses, flowery prose, and flying off to private islands for spontaneous picnics are not a part of my man's genetic code or his budget was not really the problem.  The days where we don't speak other than to pass information; the times when work supersedes family (i.e. me), the days where we don't touch unless it's accidentally, those are the things that I can't seem to move beyond.  I have always thought my romance novel summer was to blame for my discontent, but today I read a verse in Genesis that makes me rethink that position. 

Let me set the scene: Adam and Eve have committed the first sin after being deceived by that sneaky snake into doubting the truth of God's words.  When God comes to talk with them in the garden later that evening and confronts the issue of their sin, he gives them each specific consequences to the disobedience. Read the account for yourself in Genesis chapter three  at Bible Gateway, http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis+3&version=NIV

What struck me as I read the story of humanity's fall from God's grace was the truth in the woman's curse. Verse 16 says:


    To the woman he said,

   “I will make your pains in childbearing very severe;
    with painful labor you will give birth to children.
    Your desire will be for your husband, 

    and he will rule over you.”


I've given birth four times, I can attest to the pain of childbirth and labor. It's that second part that I don't want to want to claim, I think it makes me sound weak but I know it's true too.
Her desire will be for her husband and he will rule over her.  Surprisingly it wasn't the "rule" part that got me, it was the truth in the "desire" part. I long for my husband to treasure me. I want for his attention, his touch, even when I don't want to want too. You know what I mean?   Romance writers certainly seem too. By the way I stopped reading that genre and moved on to suspense and crime.

The Creeper

I  like to know what's happening in my children's worlds (yes, they each have one of their own of which they are the center).  One of my favorite ways is by checking them and their friends out on Facebook. Whenever I find out something interesting I ask about it.  My predilection for being an informed parent has earned me an affectionate nickname, "The Creeper".  I didn't mind at all this new moniker of mine, it reminded me of an episode of "Scooby Doo".  Now it seems we might have a genuine creeper on our hands and there is absolutely nothing cute or cartoonish about it.

My daughter has a problem with a boy, usually I don't worry about trouble with boys,  you know it seems to come part and parcel with teenage girls.  But this past Tuesday evening a young man showed up at the front door asking to speak with Allison.  I asked his name and business  and Allison came down to see what he needed. Sometimes it's obvious that someone has issues and although I couldn't name the reason something about this boy struck me as just NOT right. Know what I mean? Anyway after he left Allison said, "I think he has a crush on me because I spoke to him on the bus".  He had walked from his home about a 1/2 mile away to see her.  That was the beginning of a what has become quite a strange week for my daughter.

She didn't know that by showing a modicum of kindness to this boy, he would become obsessed with her. The thing that is concerning is not just the fact the he now waits outside her classes to follow her everywhere she goes at school but that he was expelled previously for bringing a knife to school and pulling it on another kid.  Now that he has become her shadow, people are telling her things that she didn't know when it was "kind of sweet" that he seemed to like her.  Not only did he have this one documented episode of violent outburst, he seems to still be focused on cutting and hurting/killing people.  I am trying to take all this in with a grain of  salt, since not 100% of what we hear is true but the initial episode was the real deal.

Allison is becoming a bit fearful, I believe.  Since he lives so close it is not something that can be left at the school doors. She is spending the weekend with her grandmother as an effort to avoid him over the weekend. If you have been in a similar situation or have advice to offer please do.  We don't know how to proceed.  Should we just wait this thing out a while and try to let it run it's course, hoping he will become discouraged by her lack of interest  or do we need to address it now in someway?

We need some guidance on dealing with this situation. 

HI-HO HI-HO It's Off to School We Go

What a morning!!! It got off to a great start, Leah was up and ready to catch the bus and she would have made it too, if not for the demand of her shoes and earrings from her older sister; not just any shoes and earrings, but the ones she had on today. Yep-you guessed it. She missed the bus.

Now because of the missed bus we needed to leave about twenty minutes sooner and Allison having just gotten up would not be ready.  Not a problem because Ben was home and he could take her on his way to work without  much inconvenience. Logical thinking solves logistical problem without  yelling or tears, yet.

With some effort, we made it out the door when we needed too. Traffic was good to us, there were no tractors between us and the four lane. Looked like we were going to make it but as we started to enter the drop off zone at the elementary school, I heard a surprised "huh" from my backseat passenger. Wesley was unwrapping himself from the blanket he'd worn since breakfast and realized he had no shoes. Yes it's true, I did not check his feet before we left the house. Still not a problem though because we had a little time and a plan.  At this point Leah texts Ben to bring shoes to the high school parking lot where I can meet him as he drops Allison. Smiling to myself and thinking "clever me", I breathed a sigh of relief  while heading to the high school. After five minutes in the parking lot waiting, my cell rings,  and it's Allison , she needs her purse from my car.

 "Not a problem", I say, "you can get it from me when I get Wesley's shoes".
To which Allison replies "Umm, we don't have any shoes. Ben didn't turn his phone on until we were already on the way".

Long story short, Allison got her purse and was 30 minutes late, Wesley made it to school 45 minutes late with red rimmed eyes from my "what were you thinking?" lecture. No doubt I was a scary sight to behold checking him in with my slightly brushed hair, make-upless face,and  mismatched pajama clad self. I don't think I'd be surprised if child services showed up in the very near future. That might be a problem.

I think Ben made it to work on time with his shoes on, but I didn't check his feet either.

It's all good though,  this morning's events  helped me make a decision. I had been considering coming off my blood pressure medication, even talked to my doctor about it. I've changed my mind.